Category: Life

Winter Persists

I’ve been in more of a reading phase than a writing phase for the last little while, soaking in books like sunshine. This feels like the Winter that won’t let go, although I just came across an email I sent to a friend last May which referenced that Spring was just arriving. Is it possible that all my memories of sunshine in March and warmth in April are just wishful hallucinations?

Sure enough, before I even finished this post, we had more snow fall. But that is not the point 🙂 I am looking forward to sharing some more book reviews in the next while, a fabulous recipe and hopefully at least one reflection on my experience of Lent this year. I have been thinking a lot this week about how self-care spirals out to positively affect so many aspects of our lives, but it is so tempting to neglect when we are under pressure because it seems negotiable.  There may or may not be a post on this topic brewing in the back of my mind.

Where does self-care fit in your list of priorities? What does it entail for you?

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Mice

http://www.isgtw.org/sites/default/files/img_2011/Black_Mouse.JPG

I am in heavy facebook withdrawal, since I discovered tonight we have mice. Without a social media outlet for my horror/anxiety/all the developments (set a trap, mouse went for it but was only stunned and not killed, I had NO clue what to do with a stunned mouse, so instead of putting a jar over it or something to contain it, I just waited for the problem to go away, which it did – the mouse disappeared for a while, I re set the trap, saw it again, realized it might be building a nest under one of our book shelves (it is blocked off by a big cardboard box so torre can’t pull the books off the shelves. I would SO MUCH RATHER him pull the books off the shelves all day every day than see ONE MORE MOUSE run across my floor.

I am too upset to close any of my brackets.

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Lent 2014

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-zOIqW9QNSQ8/T0VoEzTw_xI/AAAAAAAACDY/NHfvUMwbUoQ/s1600/Ash+Wednesday+Symbol.jpgLent almost snuck up on me this year, until I saw a notice for the United church’s pancake dinner the week before. I have only begun keeping Lent in the last few years, but I have always found it to be an excellent practice, good for me in many ways, so I am very happy that it didn’t slip by! In the past I have marked Lent by fasting from meat on Fridays and one year I read through the entire Bible over the course of Lent. This year I am taking a break from facebook (including Candy Crush, which is the real sacrifice), and less than a week in I have already seen some ripple effects.

The most immediate change is that I have spent less time overall on the computer. I didn’t see this coming, since facebook is far from my favourite way to spend time online. I thought that by avoiding facebook I’d be up to date on the blogs I follow, up to date on the blog posts I want to write, and all over the emails that I keep meaning to get to. Instead, I have been keeping busy with the real life busyness of marriage, work, parenting and ministry. I have written some emails, but I have also visited with family and friends in person, and that is great.

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Being the Oldest, Raising an Oldest

I was thinking the other day whether Torre is at an advantage or disadvantage in being my first child. As a plus, he gets much more undivided attention than kids with siblings, everything he does is new and exciting and amazing because we’ve never seen a baby learn to walk or climb before. I have pretty high self-esteem and I’m sure much of that comes from the support and positive reinforcement I have enjoyed throughout my life from family and friends. Hopefully the same is true for Torre growing up – I want him to absorb all the amazement that we feel towards him and internalize it to always know that he is precious.

However, as the oldest, Torre is exposed to my least polished-by-motherhood self: my most selfish, most anxious, most inexperienced version of parenting. Obviously I’m doing my best, but I feel like I will improve and grow with time and experience, and any future children we have will benefit from that. Maybe I’m over-optimistic about the trajectory my personal growth is on, but I do think he’s at a disadvantage in this sense. I thank God he’s so resilient and cheerful and forgiving even after moments when I don’t have the emotional stamina to put his wants before mine (he wants to be in my arms to see what’s happening up on the counter, while I want supper to get made so I’m not hangry). For what it’s worth, I think I do pretty well at putting his needs before my needs, but I feel like this can only digress into insecure ramblings. I’m a good mom, but I could be better, let’s move on.

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My 1 Year Old Walks!

It is Torre’s birthday, and I’ll not spend it blogging 😛

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